Vocal interpretations by Greg Lake

My father is many, many things. Patient, decent and bunion-footed. Heartless, cruel and cynical, however, he is not. How Andy and I got that way is a mystery of some import. Probably not to the level of who actually built Stonehenge, but certainly on equal footing with who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong. But that's not really relevant right now, I suppose.

Anyway, as we were watching the news at lunch, on came the "developing" story of the ship that's disappeared in the Atlantic. At some point over the last few days it's occurred to the powers that be that, in general, ships don't just disappear and that, perhaps, there is strangeness afoot. Maybe even pirates. Again. Oh dear.

Being the fan of civilized culture that I am, I don't have much time for pirates. I'm grateful for the fun ride they sourced at Disney, and often drop "avast" and "yar" into casual conversation just for fun. But I'll admit the overall pirate contribution to our planet Earth has been less the positive. However, until they hoist the jolly roger on the top of the local courthouse I can't say that I'll give them a whole lot of thought. This is probably of little interest and even less comfort to the families of the folks involved in this latest pirate go round.

Perhaps because of the lack of thought I'd given to this very issue, I'd never placed it in the context of the bigger picture, which is where dear old Dad comes back in. I was suitably impressed when the helmet haired anchorman informed the two of us "The Atlantic is a very large body of water." On this I cannot argue; in fact, I believe that is why they call it an ocean. But it took my Dad to really understand the full impact of this story by announcing, "I wouldn't want to buy a yacht right now."

Putting aside that I'm pretty sure this is a freighter, i.e. big ship with few to no topless sunbathing babes on it, and not a luxury vessel that's gone a' missin' and the impact on the world's wealthiest will be minimal, the decency of my Father shines through. For if the richest among us can't be happy, what chance have we, the common folk? Well played, old man.

Civility, decency, truth, justice and the American way are all losers here. There will no doubt be much handwringing thereof, but, aside from James Bond villains, who weeps for the yacht market? If you cut them do they not bleed? Those yachts just aren't going to sail themselves and, frankly, there's only so many Russian oil magnates in the world. In these terse financial times do we really want another industry going belly up? How many international playboys and trophy wives will be forced to retire to their Swiss chateaus, unable to find safe, luxurious water transportation to their remote islands off the coast of places you'll never visit anyway? Beats me, but I'm pretty sure 1 is too many and 1000 is not enough.